“you’re never to old and it’s always the perfect time”
that is my new phrase these days, something that has taken me to fully understand and to let go of fears and beliefs that you have to do things in a certain pattern and system or everything is just wrong and the world will come crashing down. thankfully the world hasn’t come crashing down around me since i so enjoy doing everything backwards. i get the thrill from my own personal entertainment and joy. i mean seriously let me illustrate this for you all.
i never graduated from high school, moved as far as i could away from home, got married at 20, got divorced at 26 and got my GED at 26. And Now…Now at 27 I am a full fledged University Student working full time. Living with a roommate who is more like a grandmotherly figure and good friend and a pup to call my own. I work four to five days a week at a small cafe that i enjoy being at and i have to say this isn’t how i ever imagined i would be handling going to school but i am doing it and you can bet i am doing it with the biggest grin there is.
i am loving every second i can find to stop and study, i even love getting up at 5:30 in the morning just to get to class and then rush off to my morning classes and then be to work by 11:30. i am busy but its a productive busy that i am enjoying and learning to manage. i am already in my second week of school and i think i am finally starting to get the hang of how everything works. any questions i have i know that there is always someplace for me to go to get the answers. there is always someone willing to help. i love my days when i can be on campus all day to stay and study and interact with others. i love just walking from one building to the next on campus feeling the energy (the learning and creativity). nothing like it that i have ever experienced before. it’s like a high i am addicted to that i don’t want to come down from.
for the first time in a long time i can confess truly that i am doing really well, great, fantastic even. i’m not sad, depressed, wondering aimlessly, jobless and with out a plan. i have been saying it for weeks now and you know what it is great to be me right now. i feel like there is some order and stability in my life and i did that. i mean seriously i did that. i certainly had help along the way but i did the hard work to get here. the payoff feels great!
there is truly nothing finer than doing something for yourself, truly really if you have been contemplating on doing something i say just go do it. you don’t need to wait just go do it now. if you have been deciding on school, grad, a job, travel, a move. just go do it. the weight that come off your shoulders after finally doing something that you have been wanting to do is the biggest relief.